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Br. Tom MM OFM: In the Footsteps of St. Francis – Story of Vocation and Mission

1. Father, could you please tell us about yourself and your family?

Before I begin to tell about myself, I want to thank you for reading ‘my story’ in the Exchange while I am still alive. Thank you to the Editors for making this possible. Of course, this being a short presentation and I can highlight only few aspects of my life. Even then, having a chance to tell my own story is a big blessing.

My birthplace is just a mile from Bharananganam, the famous shrine of St. Alphonsa, in Kerala. I was born in 1949 as the 7th and last child of a family belonging to the Syro-Malabar church. Being the last, I got the care and protection from my three brothers and three sisters. My father had a somewhat well-known grocery cum cloth shop which ensured me a childhood free of hardship. My parents, my elder brother and sister are no more. One of my sisters is a Religious working in Rajasthan, and others got married and are in Kerala. My nieces and nephews are in various countries of the world.

2. Could you please share with us your vocation story?

My upbringing was in the so-called traditional Syrian Catholic way that included attending daily morning Mass, long family prayer in the evenings and Sunday catechism. Most of the families in my predominantly catholic locality had at least one son who had become a priest and one daughter who had become a sister. Interestingly, the Diocese of Pala to which I belong has given the Catholic Church more priests and religious than any other place, probably in the whole world. Therefore, often we saw visiting priests and sisters at our church. And the Missionaries would occasionally share their story with Sunday school children. When I was young, I became an Altar boy and could assist at both Syrian and Latin Mass. Also, I belonged to a group called “Small Missionary,” meant for children organised by the Diocesan Vocation Bureau. We met every week for prayers, and then on the first Sunday of every month went from house to house collecting money for the ‘Missions’. The Vocation Bureau published a magazine that contained thrilling stories of missionary adventures in India and overseas. Being good readers, we also read books of Saints available at our Parish Office. God planted the seed of vocation in me and nourished it through all these means.

3. Why did you want to become a priest or become a religious?

As a small boy, I was aware of people choosing to become teachers, doctors, and policemen. But the context in which I grew up propelled me towards becoming a priest. At that time, I did not know the difference between a diocesan priest and a religious. Also I did not have the present understanding and desire, of being ‘a Living Reminder of Jesus’, as the purpose of my life.

4. Why did you choose to become a Franciscan?

I knew the Capuchin Friars in my locality, as I occasionally served Latin Mass in their Friary church. I had also watched stories from the “Little Flowers of St. Francis” staged at their Friary for us children. They and many other priests had invited me to join their groups. However, I did not feel drawn to them.

My choice of OFM was accidental, though it was God’s way. I had then just finished my 8th class. In reply to an advertisement in a Christian Magazine, I wrote a postcard indicating my desire. And Friar Thomas Tannikary replied, asking me to meet him at his Parish Church, 30km away. I went there with my father. He spoke with us for a few minutes and told us that I could join him at Kochi Friary and complete my studies from there. Thus I joined the ‘aspirancy’ program in Kochi and began my Franciscan journey.

5. How were your formation years?

I became familiar with Friars during the two years I spent in Kochi Friary. Fr. Charles Mathew was my senior for a year. And next year Fr. Varghese joined as my junior. Only one of my batch mates came with me to Palmaner and after a year discontinued. I had the good fortune of having Fr., Christopher Coelho, as Rector, and Friars Fidelis, Paulinus van Halderen, Berard and Vincent D’monte as lectors in Palmaner. They were great teachers and my role models. The made it clear that they wanted me and had great hope in me. Also they passed on to me their love for studies, their civility, their faith, their love for St. Francis and brotherhood. But looking back I feel we were too much sheltered from the real world of the people. Serving porridge daily in the morning to the poor was not sufficient exposure. Even at that early stage of formation, more participation in the real life of people, and some pastoral activities would have ensured a better preparation to become a priest for the people.

My next stage of formation was in Bangalore. Friars Alexis Van Leeuwen, Gerwin Van Leeuwn, Ligory and Oswald and several others in Bangalore continued to build on the good foundation I got in Palmaner. In those days we were only about 25 persons in Bangalore Friary and the parish was not as large and crowded as now. Friary was more known than the parish. And Formation took place without the pastoral involvements ( and the distractions) that we have these days. In 1975, at the age of 25, I was ordained a priest along with my batch mates Friars Varghese Sebastian, Swamy Dayanad and Scaria Varanth.

6. What is it that you like the most in St. Francis of Assisi?

I am fascinated by the depth of ‘Faith and love’ that St. Francis had that helped him respond to the Call of Jesus, with the dramatic 180-degree turn in his direction of life: from worldly ambition to heavenly ambition; to be in the world but not of it. Like Mother Mary, he understood the ‘Call’, as of God, and throwing all caution to the wind, said “Fiat”. I think Jesus and Francis shared a relationship that is beyond our comprehension. No wonder he lived the rest of his life dependent only on God, enjoying the freedom and peace that the Gospel form of life offers. Francis saw everything through the eyes of Jesus; Francis was like Jesus in his understanding and acceptance of others. And most interestingly, because of Jesus, he responded to pain, conflicts and hurts, with optimism and peace.

7. What is it that you cherished the most as a Franciscan?

I think it is Community life. By the grace of God, I have been in many communities and most of the time as the Guardian. I always paid attention to things that would enhance our life as brothers: regular community prayer, availability of wholesome food, meaningful activities, time for fun and sharing our experiences. I am grateful to the friars for their acceptance of me. I am grateful that St. Francis insisted on community life as it can bring out the best in each of us.

8. What are your favourite books, authors, saints, food, movies and why?

Books, Dramas and movies:

Books, dramas and movies on Religion, philosophy, psychology, history, politics, and literature have been my teachers and have played a significant role in my life. Reading Dramas and staging dramas can help one in many unexpected ways. Good Books and Films have the ability to give voice to the feelings of our inner self. My favourite authors, books, dramas and films are too many to mention. However, one Book did help me define the trajectory of my life: “The Living Reminder” by Fr. Henrie Nouwen. It helped me understand the Gospels and St. Francis. To realize that the aim of my life is to be a ‘living reminder of Jesus’ in every context of my life. To fill my life with goodness, fill my life with love and kindness and gratitude and compassion and generosity. To take risks with my goodness. To test the limits of my goodness. To make the only goal of life to do as much good as possiblelike Jesus. I believe this is how St. Francis too defined his life.

Saints: In my childhood, I read plenty of Books on Saints. Besides St. Francis of Assisi, I have been inspired immensely by Books and Films on Saints like Fr. Damien of Molokai, Elizabeth of Hungary, St. Thomas More, Max Millian Kolbe and Mother Theresa of Kolkata.

Favourite Food: As I lived in Singapore for about ten years and travelled to several other countries, I came in contact with a wide variety of food. But it is difficult to say which food is my favourite. Occasionally I long for the Australian Steak or the Italian pasta. Sometimes for the Chinese steamed Fish or roasted Duck, served with a glass of Australian white wine. However, usually I am content with the staple Indian food we get in our houses.

9. What are the various capacities in which you have served in the order?

For most of my 46 years as a priest, I was associated with Formation work as Lector and Rector. For a few years I ministered in Parishes as Parish Priest or assistant priest. I have been a Guardian of many communities. I was also President of the Foundation of North East India and Custos of Singapore.

10. What was your dream as friar minor?

My dream clarified gradually. For, at times there were conflicting desires and departures and detours in my faith life and commitment. However, for the past several years the dream has been to be a living reminder of Jesus always, especially as one involved in empowering others using my God-given talents and chances. To a great extent, my dream has come true. The Friars trusted me and appointed me to positions of leadership, trainer of student Friars, spiritual guide to parishioners, priests and religious. The 60 or more Retreats that I preached helped me from resting and rusting. They helped me to regularly review my own spiritual life. They have been like walking the road to Emmaus in the company of Jesus and the retreatants.

11. What are your spiritual practices you keep up in your spiritual journey?

As a Formator, I understood the value of tradition and regularity. I used to tell my students not to abandon the spiritual practices they had in their homes. After all, those practices helped us to join the Friary. Similarly, we must follow the spiritual discipline that guided us in our formation years, if we do not want to lose our way in life. Therefore I am faithful to Daily Mass, personal prayer, community prayer, retreats, regular confession, daily rosary, spiritual reading and spiritual sharing with a fellow friar.

12. What should be the approach of the church and the priest today according to you?

Church and the Priest need to have up-to-date understanding of the laity and the challenges they face; be available to offer them hope and forgiveness, be like Jesus in all circumstances. In this regard, the interventions of Pope Francis have been inspiring and motivating. Active involvement in the preparations for the Synod and Synodal Church will be accepting the guidance by the Holy Spirit. Also we cannot ignore but must learn to face the challenge of the fanatic groups in India.

13. What is your word of advice to the younger generations of the Order?

Two of the many similarities in our great role models, Jesus and St. Francis, were their understanding of this world as transitory and preoccupation with doing good for others. Both used their time and opportunities wisely. The fanatic groups are going to be a big challenge to our life and mission. How to be a like St. Francis in our troubled times is a question we need to address.

Besides this, my advice to the younger brothers in our Order is that they should not be discouraged if they do not find among the brotherhood things hoped for when they joined. God has placed you on this stage of the Franciscan Order with some dreams regarding you. Make it your mission to discover Jesus as your saviour and Lord as St. Francis did. From that relationship, fraternal love will grow in you, which will make a positive difference among the Friars and people around. Accept your identity and mission to be "a living Reminder of Jesus" in every context of life. Then you will have fulfilment and joy of being a Franciscan.

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